By request, Please Find Me is the next song I'm exploring. By far the most personal I've written so far, this song is akin to reading from my journal (which I'm learning makes for good songwriting!). I originally titled it, "Please Judge Me," seeking absolution through judgement for my behavior. Some scrapped early verses read, "Maybe you can hold me...accountable," and "I don't have the strength to follow through." For me specifically, I am addressing my relationships with work and alcohol, both addictions that have kept me from being my best self at times. The song became Please Find Me when I read, "Just because you are lost doesn't mean your compass is broken." (from Perfectly Yourself by Matthew Kelly). "Lost & Found" is a timeless theme.
Journal entry from January 8, 2018:
"I had no concerns for God as a child - I just admired everything as it was. I had no addictions. I had no language for anger or judgment. My needs were simple. I did not compete or compare. The eyes of a child can teach me much. I was built for mission then, and that mission was simple - to learn, play, and grow. Those three things turn us into adults and I fear we stop doing them."
Please Find Me is about choosing to find our child - both the one inside of us and the actual children many of us are raising or have raised. The pre-chorus reads, "I hear your voice and I have a choice, it's time to sail in from the sea." Some listeners are taken aback by the opening lyrics sung in the Dad voice:
"Six beers in, and my son is watching
He's wondering which Dad will I be"
The stresses of work and the fatigue of drinking made me an unpredictable person - sometimes happy-go-lucky and sometimes mean and impatient. A few beers fueled the fire. Maybe we've all been there, regretful the next morning. I really don't know.
The Son sings:
"I know you care, and when I think you’re there
Somehow you have escaped
Come back Dad, it’s not too late"
That's it friends. Our children grow up fast, and even if they are adults, "it's not too late." Stop what you are doing and look at them when they are speaking. Forget paying for video games or allowance - just pay them attention. Play with them as often as possible. It is never wasted time.